30-Day Blog Challange

30 Day Self-Reflection Online Journal Challenge – Day 2


Today’s Topic/Question: What am I afraid of?

Day two!!!

So today’s question is something I’ve been asked a few times since I’ve started dating. Not something I’ve actually thought about on my own prior to someone asking me.

Now I before I begin, I feel like I need to do this disclaimer every post, DO NOT comment on any grammar issues during these 30 days…I don’t grammar check when I write in my physical journal and I won’t do it here. I am keeping everything RAW here! Ok, Thank you!

The first time someone asked me, I said failure. And that still holds True. I am afraid of failure. Now failure holds different to everyone. For me it means starting something and not finishing it or it not reaching the success I feel I/it deserves. That includes failures in different walks of life. For me mainly in my business, not reaching the goal of Self-Employment/Entrepreneurship. That is a big part of my hustle! YouTube, being a Makeup Artist & running my Online Store (AND ALL of those are linked BTW, just click on them! Shameless Plug!! 🙂 IDC…LOL). There are a bunch of other passions I have, i.e., photography, (pretty much I am a creative). ONE OF THESE NEED TO happen!! What’s your plan B you ask? I feel like a lot of people ask entrepreneurs this. Now don’t get me wrong I HAVE a FT job, but I make sure I keep the end goal at the forefront of my mind. Sometimes I get caught up in the Job that I have to wheel myself back in and say to myself, “HEY HEY, this is JUST to finance my DREAM…Re-FOCUS!” I actually talk to a guy who is also an entrepreneur but has a really good FT job. It seems like sometimes we are in the same boat at different times. We get comfortable making the money we make at our jobs, and almost let our end goals fall to the background. So I know there is work I need to do and I am committed to that process. So my Plan B, is to continue focusing on my Plan A!

I feel like as soon as you feel like you failed…them BOOM!!! You’ve made it! So that’s the energy I try to keep and speak into existence.

Another thing I fear & I didn’t think about until some said it to me and them I realized, HEY! I fear that too. And that is my child dying before me. And that is something I don’t even want to think about, but in this world & being Black in this world…Well you guys know how that goes…I not going to sit here and dwell on this fear b/c…I just can’t even begin to imagine…BUT, It is something to fear and worry about. As much as we don’t want to as parents.

What Do you fear??

Day Two Down!!!!

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